Tearful Robin Bailey shares her grief over husband's death
BROADCASTER Robin Bailey has opened up about her grief one month after losing her second husband Sean Pickwell to cancer.
In an emotional and candid interview with The Today Show this morning, filmed in her Brisbane home, Bailey spoke through tears about her difficulty dealing with Pickwell's death, which they had prepared for since his terminal diagnosis in 2018.
"I've never been loved like that and neither has he. For whatever reason I was the person to take him on that journey, I know that. It's just we prepared so much for his death, we just didn't really prepare for my life afterwards," Bailey told Today host Georgie Gardner.
"With terminal cancer you have so much time to prepare. We did, there was nothing left unsaid. You know how it's going to end but it's still awful."
A day after receiving his terminal diagnosis in 2018, Pickwell, who she nicknamed "Panda", proposed to Bailey during a family trip to Movie World and they married that November.
Early last month she quit her breakfast radio hosting gig at Triple M to be at home with Pickwell, who was in the final stages of liver cancer, but tragically died in her arms just six days later.
"I will hold onto that until I join him, because it was such a beautiful gift to be in his own space with his own people," Bailey said.
The family held a celebration in Pickwell's honour at The Outpost Bar in Brisbane's The Fortitude Music Hall earlier this month.
It's been five years since the beloved Brisbane broadcaster lost her first husband Tony Smart, the father to her three sons - Fin, 19, Lewin, 17, and Piper, 14 - to suicide.
"I don't know why this has happened to me, or it's not even me, I'm an adult. I don't know why it's happened to my boys. But I will say that you get this amazing chance to just value life," Bailey said.
"There's nothing I would change. I wish he (Pickwell) was here, but cancer also gave us the ability to just grab life by the hands and shake it, and he really healed my kids - my two youngest ones particularly.
"He wasn't their dad - they had a great dad who really loved them - but Sean was just mum's partner who cared about them.
"At the wake, a friend of mine, said 'it only takes one man to believe in a boy'. And he did two."
Bailey, a veteran of Australian radio, said it was "terrifying" not knowing what was next, but she intended to follow Sean's lead.
"I had a girlfriend who died from cancer and she said I'll come back as a kookaburra. And I said (to Pickwell) 'Well, how am I going to know? What am I going to do when I need you?' and he said 'Well I can't come back as a panda because you won't see one' so he said "I'll come back as a kookaburra as well'," she said.
"And two kookaburras come onto my deck all the time since he died. So I'm thinking, 'OK you won't see them unless you're here being quiet,' so that's what I'm trying to do."